I'm beginning to wonder if it comes hand in hand with being creative and I very much suspect that it does. Creating, whether that be drawing, or taking photographs, or designing clothes even, is a very introverted activity, and it's hard to see which came first: creativity, or shyness. Are we creative because we're shy, and it's a way to express ourselves? Or is shyness a bi product of being artistic?
I'm hoping this blog will have all the wall flowers and shrinking violets quietly raising their hands and whispering *I'm shy too* but it would be equally as interesting to see that I'm wrong, it's not a creative trait. It's just a thing, an annoying unwavering condition, betrothed to the unlucky few.
But for now, seeing as this shy thing wont be going anywhere for a while, I thought it would be fun to make a shy girl's (or guys!) survival guide to get us through many an awkward social event and to teach those of you lucky out-going people what it's really like to be constantly... 'sheepish'. (I love that word!)
A Shy Girl's Survival Kit Consists of:
1. "I'm really busy" equipment.
This can come in the form of many things, but most likely it'll be a book. An example of it's usage as follows: you're going to a pub to meet your friends, they haven't arrived on time. It's a busy pub, people are looking at the girl on her own, "does she want some company?" "shall I buy her a drink?" QUICK! Whip out the book. You're far too involved in the words of Ian McEwan to talk to anyone.
Because it is simply TOO MUCH to expect your whole face to be visible to the world. People might actually look at it and that would be embarrassing.
3. Hand occupiers.
This is a strange one, but for me in social situations, as soon as I have something to do with my hands I feel much calmer. Usually this involves a drink (which explains why I get so drunk at house parties!), but I guess for other people it could be smoking (for outdoor social encounters) or maybe some knitting (just kidding).
A few years ago, I went through a really stressful time, and it got so bad that my shyness almost became like claustrophobia. I found the school classroom an especially stressful place to be, filled with my peers ready to judge me for being so quiet, and always made sure I had a believable excuse incase it became too much to be there. Now, it's to a much lesser extent, but I still have an excuse (my 'escape route') incase I need a breather. "I've got a commission to finish" "I didn't get much sleep last night" "I have to feed my rabbit." Alternate these to avoid being seen as a bore.
The capital letters say it all. This is very important in order to get by. A few glasses of wine and one can almost feel normal, and suddenly holding a conversation is easy. Just watch yourself, there's nothing more cringey than getting so drunk you end up puking spaghetti carbonara into your pillow (didn't happen..)
The face will always be the go-to for judging what sort of person you are, and when you have trouble expressing yourself with words, it's important to have a face that says "I'm a little shy, I'm not being stuck up/ a weirdo."
7. People you can trust.
Sometimes being shy gets a little much. It's hard feeling like you're never quite allowed to be yourself, like theres always a little wall between you and others that stops you connecting. Whenever I see my family, I remember the person I really am, and the person I wish I could show other people.
And there we have it.
Does anyone have anything to add to the survival kit? How do you deal with shyness?